'Them snips o'
funny stories and short dialogues in the comic papers--they make ye
laff,' sez he, 'but laffin' isn't no sign o' deep morril purpose,'
sez he, 'and it ain't genteel and refined. Abraham Linkin with his
pat anecdotes ruined our standin' with dignified nashuns,' sez he.
'We cultivated publishers is sick o' hearin' furrin' nashuns
roarin' over funny 'Merrikan stories; we're goin' to show 'em that,
even ef we haven't classes and titles and sich, we kin be dull.
We're workin' the historical racket for all that it's worth,--ef we
can't go back mor'n a hundred years or so, we kin rake in a Lord
and a Lady when we do, and we're gettin' in some ole-fashioned
spellin' and "methinkses" and "peradventures." We're doin' the
religious bizness ez slick ez Robert Elsmere, and we find lots o'
soul in folks--and heaps o quaint morril characters,' sez he."
"Sakes alive, Dan'l!" broke in his sister; "what's all that got to
do with your yarn 'bout the hoss trade?"
"Everythin'," returned Dan'l. "'For,' sez he, 'Mr. Borem,' sez he,
'you're a quaint morril character. You've got protracted humor,'
sez he. 'You've bin an hour tellin' that yarn o' yours! Ef ye
could spin it out to fill two chapters of a book--yer fortune's
made! For you'll show that a successful hoss trade involves the
highest nash'nul characteristics. That what common folk calls
"selfishness," "revenge," "mean lyin'," and "low-down money-
grubbin' ambishun" is really "quaintness," and will go in double
harness with the bizness of a Christian banker,' sez he.
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