[46] And not only have I no intention of giving
you either my blessing or my consent, but I intend to come and punish
you well for your follies, like a little boy, in spite of your officer's
rank, because you have shown me that you are not fit to wear the sword
entrusted to you for the defence of your country, and not for fighting
duels with fools like yourself. I shall write immediately to Andrej
Karlovitch to beg him to send you away from Fort Belogorsk to some place
still further removed, so that you may get over this folly.
"Upon hearing of your duel and wound your mother fell ill with sorrow,
and she is still confined to her bed.
"What will become of you? I pray God may correct you, though I scarcely
dare trust in His goodness.
"Your father,
"A.G."
The perusal of this letter aroused in me a medley of feelings. The
harsh expressions which my father had not scrupled to make use of hurt
me deeply; the contempt which he cast on Marya Ivanofna appeared to me
as unjust as it was unseemly; while, finally, the idea of being sent
away from Fort Belogorsk dismayed me. But I was, above all, grieved at
my mother's illness.
I was disgusted with Saveliitch, never doubting that it was he who had
made known my duel to my parents.
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