A man _must_ be original. He must write common-sense
too--hard exactions I know, but it cannot be helped.
I transmit you a specimen. Like all great discoveries, the chief merit of
my invention is its simplicity. Lest, however, "the meanest capacity"
(which cannot, by the way, be supposed to be addicted to PUNCH) should
boggle at it, it may be as well to explain that every letter of the final
word of each alternate line must be pronounced as though Dilworth himself
presided at the perusal; and that the last letter (or letters) placed in
_italics_ will be found to constitute the rhyme. Here, then, we have
A RENCONTRE WITH A TEA-TOTALLER.
On going forth last night, a friend to see,
I met a man by trade a s-n-o-_b_;
Reeling along the path he held his way.
"Ho! ho!" quoth I, "he's d-r-u-n-_k_."
Then thus to him--"Were it not better, far,
You were a little s-o-b-e-_r_?
'Twere happier for your family, I guess,
Than playing off such rum r-i-g-_s_.
Besides, all drunkards, when policemen see 'em,
Are taken up at once by t-h-_e_-_m_."
"Me drunk!" the cobbler cried, "the devil trouble you!
You want to kick up a blest r-o-_w_.
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