P.S.--If ETHEL really didn't understand her position, and would like
to reopen the matter, I would not be haughty about it.--B. C-C.
DEAR, KIND, GOOD MR. PUNCH,--The reason is obvious--the men don't and
won't propose to the right girls. Take my own case. I've just stayed
three weeks with the COOL-CHEEKS, and felt quite certain BERTIE would
have proposed. He had all the symptoms badly. I saw him give his
little brother half-a-crown to go indoors for ten minutes, and the way
he _would_ go in the summer-house and for long walks--with _me_--made
it quite clear (as I thought) what was going to happen. Yet, he let
me come away without a word! I'm sure _I_ don't want to run after him
(or anybody else), but I _did_ think he meant something. We suited
one another admirably. In fact, if he doesn't ask _me_ with all the
opportunities he had, he'd ask no one.
Yours, just-a-little-disappointed, ETHEL TRINKERTON,
_The Thorns, Bayswater._
P.S.--He carried my umbrella almost hourly--and you know what
_that_ means. If BERTIE was only nervous, and would like another
chance--well, we are always at home on Sunday afternoons.--E.T.
* * * * *
[Illustration: A REAL CONVERT.
_Local Preacher_ (_giving an account to the Vicar of the Parish of a
dispute he has had with the Leading Lights of his Sect_). "YES, SIR,
AFTER TREATMENT THE LIKES O' THAT, I SAYS TO 'EM, 'FOR THE FUTURE,'
SAYS I, 'I CHUCKS UP ALL RELIGION, AND I GOES TO CHURCH!'"]
* * * * *
A HINT TO EDITORS.
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