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Jacobs, W. W., 1863-1943

"The Substitute Deep Waters, Part 9."

There's no need to make such a fuss over a bit of coke.'
"'You've wasted pretty near arf a 'undered-weight,' I ses. 'I've a good
mind to report you.'
"'Don't do that, watchman!' he ses, in a pitiful voice. 'Don't do that!
'Ere, I tell you wot I'll do. I'll pick it all up agin.'
"Afore I could move 'and or foot he 'ad shifted a couple o' cases out of
'is way and was in among the empties. I stood there dazed-like while two
bits o' coke came flying back past my 'ed; then I 'eard a loud whistle,
and 'e came out agin with 'is eyes rolling and 'is mouth wide open.
"'Wot's the matter?' ses the skipper, staring at 'im.
"'I--I--I'm sorry, watchman,' ses that beast of a boy, purtending 'e was
'ardly able to speak. 'I'd no idea----'
"'All right,' I ses, very quick.
"'Wot's the matter?' ses the skipper agin; and as 'e spoke it came over
me like a flash wot a false persition I was in, and wot a nasty-tempered
man 'e could be when 'e liked.
"'Why didn't you tell me you'd got a lady-friend there?' ses the boy,
shaking his 'ed at me. 'Why, I might 'ave hit 'er with a bit o' coke,
and never forgiven myself!'
"'Lady-friend!' ses the skipper, with a start. 'Oh, Bill, I am
surprised!'
"My throat was so dry I couldn't 'ardly speak. 'It's my missis,' I ses,
at last.
"'Your missis?' ses the skipper. 'Woes she 'iding behind there for?'
"'She--she's shy,' I ses. 'Always was, all 'er life.


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