One never knows what
may happen.'
"Want of money was keeping us prisoners at Le Havre, when Arthur
Gordon chanced to meet an old acquaintance, who was the captain of
an American sailing vessel. He confided his embarrassment to his
friend, and the latter, whose vessel was to sail at the end of the
same week, kindly offered us a free passage. The voyage was one
long torture to me, for it was then that I first served my
apprenticeship in shame and disgrace. By the captain's offensive
gallantry, the lower officers' familiarity of manner, and the
sailors' ironical glances whenever I appeared on deck, I saw that
my position was a secret for no one. Everybody knew that I was
the mistress and not the wife of the man whom I called my husband:
and, without being really conscious of it, perhaps, they made me
cruelly expiate my fault. Moreover, reason had regained its
ascendency, my eyes were gradually opening to the truth, and I was
beginning to learn the real character of the scoundrel for whom I
had sacrificed all that makes life desirable.
"Not that he had wholly ceased to practise dissimulation. But
after the evening meal he often lingered at table smoking and
drinking with his friend the captain, and when he joined me
afterward, heated with alcohol, he shocked me by advocating
theories which were both novel and repulsive to me.
Pages:
348
349
350
351
352
353
354
355
356
357
358
359
360
361
362
363
364
365
366
367
368
369
370
371
372