He must marry someone; that was already settled. He could not marry a
lady; that was absurd. He must marry a poor woman. Yes, but a fallen
one? Was he not fallen himself? Ellen would fall no more. He had only
to look at her to be sure of this. He could not live with her in sin,
not for more than the shortest time that could elapse before their
marriage; he no longer believed in the supernatural element of
Christianity, but the Christian morality at any rate was indisputable.
Besides, they might have children, and a stigma would rest upon them.
Whom had he to consult but himself now? His father and mother never need
know, and even if they did, they should be thankful to see him married to
any woman who would make him happy as Ellen would. As for not being able
to afford marriage, how did poor people do? Did not a good wife rather
help matters than not? Where one could live two could do so, and if
Ellen was three or four years older than he was--well, what was that?
Have you, gentle reader, ever loved at first sight? When you fell in
love at first sight, how long, let me ask, did it take you to become
ready to fling every other consideration to the winds except that of
obtaining possession of the loved one? Or rather, how long would it have
taken you if you had had no father or mother, nothing to lose in the way
of money, position, friends, professional advancement, or what not, and
if the object of your affections was as free from all these _impedimenta_
as you were yourself?
If you were a young John Stuart Mill, perhaps it would have taken you
some time, but suppose your nature was Quixotic, impulsive, altruistic,
guileless; suppose you were a hungry man starving for something to love
and lean upon, for one whose burdens you might bear, and who might help
you to bear yours.
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